Friday, February 12, 2010

Thrift Store Thursday and the Littles' Dictionary

Thrift Store Thursday! Slim pickin's this week, sad to say... Guess I need to wait for yard sale season for the truly heinous and grotesque.

Remember when I said that there was nothing more icky to me than the thought of buying lingerie and underwear at the thrift store? I stand corrected and present to you, the following...

Oh yeah, I want to adhere some rubber boob covers to my skin. You know, ones that have already been attached to a stranger's shweddy hooters.

Rut roh, raggy.... Fido got into the catnip again.

Is this not the most scraggly jacked-up bird you have ever seen? Makes you wonder what the criteria is for the workers at the thrift store to actually throw something in the garbage. "So it has wires protruding at the wings...so the feathers are hanging off in chunks in places...so one of the feet only has two toes and one eye is hanging off... We can still SELL IT! YESSSS!"

Friends, I am a native Floridian, and I can tell you that we are not known for our owls. Note that they tried to tie in to something we actually ARE known for by throwing a couple of random oranges in the front. It would kind of be like going on vacation to Arizona and buying a kitschy little, oh, polar bear or something. Whooo Whooo Whoooo actually buys this sh*t? Why, tourists who stop at Stuckey's, that's whoooooo! (*rimshot* thank you, thank you...)

Yep, that's a butt. You know, on second thought, this is not such a bad thing. What better way to tell the world to kiss your ass before you have finished your coffee in the morning without having to actually verbalize it?

And to wrap things up, a couple of random entries from the Dictionary according to the Littles:
(Chase) Salt and Pepper Channel: the "snow" you see when it is not on a broadcasting channel. (As in "They're heeeeeeeeeeere...")
(Hunter) Vagina: A woman's penis.
Yeah, I know. I have some work to do.


Jennifer said...

Always enjoy reading your blog.

btw - how much was the red shredded bird?

Anonymous said...

Seriously makes me wonder how come they don't accept a lot of the stuff I take. Come on I have never dropped anything off that compares to anything you've posted.

Julie said...

I think you would love to check out http://thriftstorehorror.blogspot.com/ my friend and her friend host this site and think you'd love checking it out.
I've been spending the last 45 minutes reading all over your blog. Just happen to find you blog hopping. I haven't done it in a very long time and felt down tonight so need to find some goodness. I found it here at your blog.
I am your newest follower.
I'll be back to read more. Take care and God Bless!